53 years. 2 days.

Its been 53 years since His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, has been allowed to see his home. 53 years since Tibetans have been allowed to openingly express their love and devotion towards their spiritual teacher, within their own homeland.

53 years since 86,000 Tibetans were killed and since more than 6,000 monastries were destroyed.

Now, I'm not posting this in hopes to create some sort of sentiment surrounding the approaching anniversary but...

Its been 2 days since 3 Tibetans set themselves on fire in the name of the conflict between the Chinese government and the Tibetans. Bringing the death toll to 27 immolations since 2009.

27 suicides over 3 years.

Forget the anniversary. Forget the political history.

Something is currently wrong.
People are currently suffering.

I don't wish to incite a political debate around this. I simply want to look at the bare facts; Twenty-seven. All ranging in age, gender, and

Now as practicioners, we are urged to remain aware of our feelings and investigate their motives...to go into the deep, raw, (and often scary) emotions that arise. Personally, many have arose for me...

I'm angry.
I'm angry that those who have self-immolated are being called "criminals" and "terrorists." I'm angry at the fingerpointing and the lack of transparency.

I'm angry that they gave up. That they allowed their violent emotions and hopelessness inspire them to take their own lives. I'm angry at myself for wondering if any of the international spotlight would have been possible without it.

But the common thread I feel through all of these thoughts is this overwhelming sense of sadness. A heavy sense of sorrow because of the pervasive suffering underlining all of it; the suicide, the government control.

I'm angry and sad because of this suffering... which gives rise to such numbers as 53 years, 6,000 destroyed monastries, 86,000 lives lost, 2 days ago, 3 Tibetans, 27 suicides...

I'm angry and sad because I see both sides suffering.
I'm angry and sad because this suffering can be avoided.
I'm angry and sad because I wonder where to start.